The last 129.6 miles on my bike recap.

John Muir is a well known and fun trail system in the Kettle Moraine area. Located just 30 minutes south of my baby's momma's momma's (Oconomowoc, WI), it provides easy lodging as well. Becky and I got up at 5:30 and were out the door around 6am. A stop at Brueggers for a little breakfast and coffee and away we go.

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We got to the course at about 6:50 with just enough time to set up for the 8am start. Met up with Nate "shred the gnar" Woolever and we set a dual pit under the newly purchased EZ-Up. Nate was going 12 solo as well with his future baby's momma, Kati "6 months pregnant" Woolever, to arrive later as support.

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We all lined up for one of the shortest Le man's starts you'll ever see. I made my goal of hitting the trail first and set the pace for the first mile. Some team guys came by and it was "game on" to see how well I could keep them in sight without expending too much energy. Lap one went down and it appeared I had a gap with my 50 minute lap time.

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Laps 2 and 3 I saw no one, and my pit stops were not long enough to get info on how I was doing. Towards the end of lap 4 Chris Strout (4th place) caught me and we passed through the start/finish together. He stopped at his pit and that was the last I saw of him.

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Lap 5,6 and 7 I still didn't know where I was except that I thought I was out in front and Chris was hot on my tail (I kept looking, but no Chris). I found out at the end of lap 8 that I was in fact in second. I was told 1st was 3 minutes in front of me and 3rd place was 4 minutes back (in fact, the rider by the name of Andrew Hanson had close to 20 minutes on me at that point.) Well, I knew at my pace I had 4 laps left and my body hurt...bad. My legs felt like crap, my back hurt, and my stomach was on the verge of quitting, but I didn't come to be a pussy.

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So off I went. 4 laps left and I put into my "4 hour time trial after riding 8 hours" pace. I kept telling my stomach to shut up and reminding my mind that the pain in my legs would hurt more if I didn't keep riding. I was hoping that 1st and 3rd were hurting as well. At the end of lap 10 I was informed that I was now in first by 17 minutes. Looks like Andrew may have burned his matches too early and he had to quit. A pit crew member under another tent suggested I take a quick break, but I did not want to risk it and off I went for the 11th, and second too last lap.

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At the end of the 11th lap I was informed I now had 20 minutes on 2nd and 80 minutes to finish another lap. With lap times now close to an hour I took off for lap number 12 to secure my lead. That lap sucked. I had no motivation to ride except to finish in under 80 minutes. My whole body wanted to go to sleep, but hey, I was still passing people. 67 minutes later (my slowest lap by far) I crossed the line for the last time. 12 laps. 129.6 miles. 11 mph average.

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Race Notes:

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-The Gary Fisher Supercaliber 29'er kicks ass.

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-There are a heck of a lot of trail riders in the early afternoon at John Muir. Lots of kids (good). Lots of bare heads (bad).

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-With all the near misses, I never actually hit those damn streaky gophers. I did, however, see one had met it's demise out on the trail. Poor little guy.

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-Overgrowth. If I have one complaint it was the bushes and branches that extended into the trail. My arms were shredded by the end (see pic). My helmet almost got ripped off at one point (Nate's did get dented). They also kept trying to poke me in the eyes.

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-The last 4 laps will hopefully not be that bad again. I already have a game plan that will help alleviate the back, leg, and stomach troubles. It is a 4 pronged attack. No I will not tell you, but they are not exactly secrets.

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-Nate got a strong 8 laps in. Him and his wife also helped me shred the gnar by crewing at one of my pit stops.

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-Second place looked like an exciting finish. In 3rd place by 5 minutes, Chris Schotz rode a super fast last lap time to overtake 2nd (Daniel Brennan) by 15 seconds. OUCH!

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-The trails sure were different as the sun traveled across the sky. Those shadows got to be tricky towards the end.

Coming in for the 1st of 2 extended pit stops (end of lap 5). About 4 minutes in length. The baby's momma ready with bottles filled with water, calories, and a little love(ahhhhhh).

I am a blur I tell you. Kati seen here on the right. The unused and lonely Paragon at the bottom.

Done...finally. Nina is there to celebrate the big win. Jersey zipped up for the big finish. Damn, I am so expert (as in so pro, but not).

Nina and I going to collect our bounty.

A pic of the me and the "Spaz" with our medal.

Do you have your tickets....TO THE GUN SHOW? Note the scratches on the arm. I have a matching left.

Nina is tired from so much excitement. The baby's momma is showing you all a little shoulder.

Time to hit the hay. You may be reading this at work right now. Why? Why not get some work done? It is probably Monday and there is a lot to do, but you are wasting time on this crap.

Oh well. Till next time.

12 Hours of John Muir

I am tired and sore.

12 laps done and completed. Last 4 done were shear determination. Last one sucked BAD.

133 some odd miles. Yeah, 133.

First place medal.

Straight gangsta.

Hopefully, recap and pics tonight when I get home tonight.

Awww snap.

Gone to the land of cheese for 12 hours of fun.

By the way I am famous now.

That is so expert.

Steeplechase, leading, and the alternate

Steeplechase has come and gone. The course is the bomb thanks to hard working locals like Jeff Robertson and Matt Kurke.
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I helped some at registration during the day all while complaining how tired I was (you have to set up the excuses early). You see, while you slackers were sleeping, my baby's momma and I were up late every night last week overhauling a unit in one of the duplexes. Friday saw me hitting the hay at 3:30am, yawn. It also didn't help that my body had not felt 100% for the last 2 weeks.
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Well, we all lined up and Hollywood was no where to be seen so I decided to "party on" at the start. 3/4 of a mile into it I popped hard while leading out the field. Went from 1st to 20th or so in a flash and spent the first lap thinking about how I suck and was tired. At least I got to talk a little smack as they went around.
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The beginning of the second lap I finally felt better and started passing riders. I was counting but it is hard to use your fingers for such purposes when they are breaking and shifting. I think it was this lap that a bee stung me in the chest, just below the heart rate belt. Another flew down the back of my jersey, so I stopped a mile later to fish it out. The buzzing coming from my jersey was driving me nuts.
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Third lap was the one I wanted to lay in the weeds and take a nap the most. The urge was bad, but I had seen Fischer had DNF'ed. With me being the "back up" to the fearsome threesome it was my obligation to finish for the Velorochester team. The team competition points were now resting on my shoulders.
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The feed zone at the end of the 3rd lap saw me begging for caffeine so that I wouldn't fall asleep on the trail. Fischer helped out with a Gu with the kick I needed (he was worried about the team points I guess). 4th lap got done with and I went home to sleep. 14th place was the end result. Had the body running on all cylinders I am sure I could have squeezed out a top ten. Oh well.
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The big news is that my place actually counted for the team competition (the alternate comes through). May not have been top three, but it still counted.
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Congrats to Ben on his 2nd place finish (rumor is he may actually update his blog soon). A mechanical may have prevented him from taking his first big win. His "faster" brother finished seconds behind.
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I feel I am starting to get my strength back thanks to a double top secret off bike training program. Hopefully next weekend will go as planned. Got the baby's momma all ready to crew for me and I still have a chip on my shoulder over my electrolyte loading experience.
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Me on the far left "partying on". Now you see me.

Now you don't.

The look of "oh crap" after I popped hard. Looks like I could use a nap.

We have the local mtb TT tonight. Then 12 hours of fun on Saturday.

For the love of God, will you please get back to work?

4 Hours of Gears

Saturday has come and gone and it did not go so well. Along with carbo loading I decided to electrolyte load as well. This put me in a world of hurt known as Hypertonic (aka, too much electrolytes in the body, thanks for that info Sugardaddy). I don't want to be there again.

I can look at both positives and negatives of the race.

First the negatives:

-I got to the race with just enough time to set up and throw on my jersey as the people were lining up for the start.
-No prerace stretch, no prerace warm up.
-At the start of the race I had a huge headache and REALLY bad legs. (Symptom of hypertonic)
-My stomach was going haywire. (Symptom of hypertonic)
-The headache got worse and worse until it literally brought me to my knees 4 hours into the race. (Symptom of hypertonic).


Now the positives:

-I fought through all the pain in my head and legs for 4 hours. It was a good fight between me and my body.
-I was within 3 minutes of 1st at the time despite everything going wrong and stopping to stretch 3 hours into it.
-Food and hydration needs were dialed (except those damn electrolytes).
-I learned a lesson
-I am pissed and plan to take it out in 2 weeks at the next 12 hour.

Changes?
-Electrolytes are a replenish as you need them sort of thing. Do that.
-Get there earlier
-Kick some ass?
-Don't wait 2 days to write about the damn race.
-Take pictures.

Work?

One More Time!

Paragon you ready?
Supercal you ready?

Repeat?

All packed and ready to go. No pit crew this time, going striaght gangsta.

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Gotta go order some windows at Home Depot and then go to work.

Fearsome foursome? Not yet.

This weekend marked my return to the expert ranks. You see, I have been racing since I was 15, expert since I was 18. Then I took a several year break from racing regularly to "find" myself (read get fat). 2005 saw me try a race in the newly formed Comp division, DNF. 2006 saw me try Comp again, but with much better results. This year I returned to expert, although races like the MNSCS series are low on the season's priority list (Just lining up my excuses now).

Harmon park is a lot of FAST singletrack packed into a small area. There is not much of anything for elevation change or trees. This set up the race for drafting and plenty of opportunity to see the other racers. At the start I was able to hit the singletrack in 11th position. I spent that 1st lap behind 2 Penn guys with local hot shot Matt Kurke behind me. Matt and I couldn't help but be frustrated with the fact we were only seconds behind the lead group of 8. Matt went to the front at the second lap to bridge and I tried to go with him, but the legs were feeling the road and mountain TT's from this week. The second lap saw Matt seconds in front of me and the Penn riders, and the front group just 15 seconds farther. After the second lap my race didn't go so well. I slipped out in a corner and permanently lost the wheel of Matt and the Penn guys. The Accelgel, while fine in training, was to thick in the race and I threw it up (gotta get some more Hammergel). I had to ride the race on water alone. 4th and 5th laps saw Matt and the Penn duo not far off the front, but I was slowly dropping. The lack of calories was getting to me, but hadn't hit me hard enough to harvest the local vegetation. A Salsa rider caught me and towed me around for much of the 5th and final lap. I was getting ready to shoot out of the singletrack and set up for the sprint when "bam". I slid out on my fourth corner (I was leaning my bike over too much given that these corners were hard packed with light sand on top). Well, Salsa dude had only a little way to go, so I came in the finish area without whipping it out (the sprint that is).

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13th place overall was were I ended up. I am very happy with that considering it was my first expert race in years and my body is fairly beat down with training. Gotta beat it down to build it up. By the way, I said "beat it". He, he.

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Chris and Brendan were 2nd and 3rd in the 3 up sprint for the win. Ben was 7th, just seconds behind. They constitute the "Fearsome Threesome" of the Velorochester riders. Together they will do some damage to the team competition in that category. I consider myself the alternate. Just in case one of them has a bad day. The "Fearsome Foursome"? No, I am not there yet, and my appearances on the MNSCS circuit will be few.

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Sugardaddy and I shared a car on the way up. He won a 4 up sprint in comp to roll across the line in 10th, but he rolled across the "lap" gate line and not the "finish". Those silly road riders. He ended with 13th in his category as well.

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The sport riders out on the unique course. Thanks Skinnyski.

A pick of the "Fearsome Foursome". Not sure who is who.

In other big news....one of my homies that is a true OG got his woman knocked up. Congratulations Cory!! Hopefully we will see nothing but good times and not you on Maury Povich yelling, "I am not the baby's daddy"!

Get to work.

Tuesday's mountain TT

Yeah, that is how I felt/rode last night.

Dreaming to dream

I just figured out how I can have a banner year.

I could have really cool race recaps like someone I know: "So I went to a race, blah, blah, blah. I got bored so I hung up my cell phone and attacked, blah, blah, blah. I gapped the field by 10 minutes, blah, blah, blah. I almost didn't realize I was about to cross the finish line, so I stopped e-mailing on my Blackberry and raised my hands in dominance, blah, blah, blah. My brother and my other teammates(Part of the The Empire) cleaned up the rest of the top spots, blah, blah, blah. After the race I saved 14 kids from a burning building, blah, blah, blah. Ok, ok, I saved them DURING the race, but I did not want to brag."

Note: My race recaps would not include my brother, or saving kids from a burning building, as my brothers don't race and I burn easily.

Oh to dream, to dream.

Alright, time to stop dreaming and go to work.

TT's, Dandelions, and Nina is crazy

TT's

For the 2 people that read my crap you may be interested in the MTB TT series at Steeplechase the next 4 weeks. If you don't come then you are a slacker. Yeah, that is right, slacker.

Dandelions

Headed out on a road ride last week that would last a meek 2 hours. Wind was in the 30 mph hour range and I headed straight into it with some sustained intervals planned. I reached Eyota a little over one hour, 2 sets of intervals, 2 gu packs and a 15 mph pace later. I was actually impressed with the pace because the wind was a bitch (speaking of bitch, did you hear about Paris Hilton? Ha, ha). Well, things were turning ugly quick as I had brought 2 gu's with the understanding that I MIGHT need 1 of them. At the turn around my body was STARVING, but the tailwind made things bearable. 30mph light spinning into town was much appreciated. Just on the edge of town I was going cross eyed and checked the seat bag for cash. Nada, but with a field full of dandelions in front of me, a knowledge of those weeds being edible, and a stomach that was so sad, I threw down a handful and sputtered back into town. So there you go, a new source for riding fuel.

Nina is Crazy

Yesterday we tore up the ground to make our own garden. Mean while Nina decided to spend the whole time freaking out about a 7 foot stick in the back yard. Literally obsessed. She kept banging that thing into us, so I put it in a place that would keep her out of our hair.

My baby's momma destroying our environment.

Nina says, "Dad, I'll still get that stick, dumbass."

She's got mad hops.

And strong jaws.

What are you looking at?

Monday morning...got to go back to work, maybe you would care to do the same?

"Pro" News, New bike, and My Baby's Momma

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For immediate release:

A great stir took over the peloton at the Ken Woods Memorial race when it was realized Charly Tri, aka Jo Mama, was not present in the Cat 3 peloton at the start of the third and final lap. A spokesperson (a unique 8 year old child with a goatee, wooden leg, and penchant for spitting) for Mr. Mama is quoted as having said that the prolific rider was suffering from gastrointestinal issues that forced him to abandon at the end of the second lap (and near the Porto Pottys). "Charly was not feeling well all race. He was only able to go at about 80%, and feared what could happen out in the middle of nowhere. He was happy that despite his condition, he was able to stay with the stronger riders on the most difficult parts of the great course. He expressed great disappointment because he was sure he could make the last selection on the hill and offer an intense ending," says the spokesperson. It appears as though Mr. Mama's next race will be the Spring Cup. He spent the rest of the weekend with his wife, enjoying her birthday and doing some secret training.
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I hope that sounded "pro" despite the fact I don't resemble "pro" any other way.

Here I am at the start of the race with a decent headache. #670

We headed to Red Wing for some chillin. The next day we ate breakfast at the Blue Moon Cafe downtown. HIGHLY RECOMMENDED.

Did someone get a new bike for their birthday? Hmmm, looks like a loving husband already added a lot of "upgrades" to his wife's new cross/road bike.

W.O.W., like Velorochester, but for the ladies.

Just before I dropped her hard with the patented 15mph attack.

A little off-roading action on the road slicks.

That is it for now.

I gotta go to work, hint, hint.

"Pro" News, New bike, and My Baby's Momma

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For immediate release:

A great stir took over the peloton at the Ken Woods Memorial race when it was realized Charly Tri, aka Jo Mama, was not present in the Cat 3 peloton at the start of the third and final lap. A spokesperson for Mr. Mama is quoted as having said that the prolific rider was suffering from gastrointestinal issues that forced him to abandon at the end of the second lap (and near the Porto Pottys). "Charly was not feeling well all race. He was only able to go at about 80%, and feared what could happen out in the middle of nowhere. He was happy that despite his condition, he was able to stay with the stronger riders on the most difficult parts of the course. He expressed great disappointment because he was sure he could make the last selection on the hill and offer an intense ending," says the spokesperson. It appears as though Mr. Mama's next race will be the Spring Cup. He spent the rest of the weekend with his wife, enjoying her birthday and doing some secret training.
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That sounded "pro" despite the fact I don't resemble "pro" any other way.

Here I am at the start of the race with a decent headache. #670

We headed to Red Wing for some chillin. The next day we ate breakfast at the Blue Moon Cafe downtown. HIGHLY RECOMMENDED.

Did someone get a new bike for their birthday? Hmmm, looks like a loving husband already added a lot of "upgrades" to his wife's new cross/road bike.

W.O.W., like Velorochester, but for the ladies.

Just before I dropped her hard with the patented 15mph attack.

A little off-roading action on the road slicks.

That is it for now.

I gotta go to work, hint, hint.

Babies, Crits, and Land of Cheese

Weekend day #1

Well, Sat I drove 5 hours to attend my first coed baby shower. Got pulled over for rolling a stop sign, damn racial profiling.

Then drove 90 minutes to see the friend's new baby.

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Then at 9:30pm we finally arrived at my baby's granddaddy's and grandmomma's where I quickly fell asleep.

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Exciting day, eh?

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Weekend day #2

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Sunday arrives in WI with great weather. The baby's momma and I chill outside (in da hood o' course) and watch the Rolex's to know when to roll out. We jammed out of the hood packing heat cause that is howz we do it. A stop at the Gap outlet store and we were out to hang wit da homies.

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Mad town waz call'n and I saw my peeps hanging at the crit. The Moore brothers tell of their gangsta first and second place rides in the ghetto of WI da previous day. Signed up, put the 9mm away, and it was crit time.

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The other gangs were popping their homies off the front all race, but none of them were true O.G.'s that could back it up. The last straight away was where it was going down.

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The sprint was like this: boxed in at about 6th, frustrated with 1st riding away, find a hole, sprint around group to go for it, one of them swerves as I go by and my left shoe says hello to his front wheel, he swerves away and then back and it is my rear wheel that doesn't budge as he ends up going down, he breaks his collarbone, ambulance comes. I spend the rest of the day feeling guilty and trying to figure out if there was anyway I caused him to go down (I am sure I did not), not about how I got 2nd place in my first true cat 3 race.

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Riding in 3rd position. Close to the front, but out of the wind.

The sprint. Me upright on the left. The winner upright on the right. I circled the rider who had gone down. I hope he recovers quickly.

The weekend was full of frustrations. To top it off we came across an accident on our way home. I guy on a motorcycle had gone down and we had the unfortunate experience of seeing his lifeless body on the road.

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Remember folks, we live on borrowed time. Try to keep it all in perspective out there...

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but for now you should get back to work.

Riding in shorts once again!

Dude, I did my second ride this year with shorts! Sweet tanlines here I come, so look out ladies!

Went out Tuesday, found my favorite loooong climb (by MN standards) and spent the next hour doing hill repeats up it at an intense pace. Most hills seem to be treat me fine, but those really steep ones put the wood to me. As Sugar Daddy says (in his best Keith Bontrager voice). "climbing, sprinting, time-trialing. Pick Two." I told him I wanted climbing and sprinting, but I guess it doesn't quite work that way. What kind of coach is that?

This Wednesday saw who has fragile egos (hand raised). A more modest ride got ramped up and ended with three of us waaaaay off the front. We got a little out of hand, but by breaking away we proved that we must be really well endowed.

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Other then that, the days are finally getting warmer. I have a crit this weekend in WI that hopefully will go well. I have to travel to other states now where riders don't know about my patented 15 mph attacks. They have no idea what is in store for them.

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Do you get paid by the hour to read this crap? Get back to work, there are millions on welfare depending on you.

Sex, hills, and gett'n dropped.

The Oxbow Classic is just that. Infamous for it's Oxenburg climb with grades up to 22% and non-traditional gravel roads.

If you are a consistent reader here (may God help your soul) you may remember the bad incident with the eggbeater pedals. With the thought of my 12/24 hour races planned for this year I wanted to avoid a mechanical, so I bought some new Time pedals. Much better quality, better piece of mind. Only problem was that they came with a 50 gram weight penalty, uh oh.

Well we all lined up for the "A" race. This would be my first race with cat 1/2 riders in it. There must have been a sale down at The Gap because 9 of the 12 A1 riders were all wearing the same outfit. How embarrassing! The proverbial gun went off and I went to the front to put in one of my patented 15mph attacks. Because everyone was still fresh I was not able to break free.

Then we hit the Oxenburg hill. I was in great position towards the front, but that is were the good ended and the bad started. Remember that 50 gram weight penalty with my new pedals? Yup, you guessed it, I got dropped on the hill. Not be done in by my own pedals I gave chase and got into contact with the front group again a mile later.

Towards the end of the 1st lap I moved towards the front again with the legs feeling great. I wanted to have as much of an advantage when we hit the Oxenburg considering the huge weight problem with the pedals. Then those bastards dropped me again. Once again, I gave chase and I caught back on. On the way up the next biggest hill on the backside of the course my legs cramped and that was all she wrote. I drank a bunch of water and started the futile chase. It was not to be this time. I finished up the 2nd half of the course by myself, riding just under the effort that would bring back the cramps. Don't know how I finished. I do know that Velorochester took 3 of the top 4 spots in the A2's (and the win). They were all riding much lighter pedals then I was, bastards.

******Warning the following has sexual content (but no reference to nappy headed hoes)**********
The one cool thing, as I was completing the last lap something interesting occurred. A blue truck was making its way up the hill I was descending, only I could not identify a driver. It was not until I got closer that I saw the BACK of a girl (wearing a flowered tank top by the way) bouncing up and down in the drivers seat. Knowing there would be boyfriend checking his rear view mirror I threw up the Hollywood "party on" sign and continued to the bottom. Later I asked my wife if we could get a truck to replace my Jetta.

The steepest section of the climb.


Me trying to overcome the huge gravitational pull from my "heavy" pedals.
The group after they left me for dead.
Trying (unsuccessfully) to get back into contact with the group.


Those bastard pedals. I still plan on keeping them because I figure a 50 gram weight penalty is better than a broken spindle or chowed bearings, but it is still disappointing.



I guess it was just one of those days.

That was a long one today. Do you suppose your boss actually thought you were working?

Thanks to www.skinnyski.com for the pics.

Oxbow Classic

Ultra quick recap.

I didn't win (I heard you gasp).

I saw a couple having sex (yes, that is true).

Now to go out dancing to celebrate my baby's momma bff's birthday.

Easter

Easter. A time to reflect on the important things in life like dyed eggs, chocolate bunnies, and something that has to do with going to church. Not sure what that last one has to be in there, but it is kinda like Christmas time. Just when you are all pumped about opening presents you have to go to church. Hmmph. How did the Churches convince people to come on days that were obviously designed for days off and presents? They are sneaky I tell you.



Becky and my sister Kim. Kim likes to give the visual impression that

A) She is a boy.

B) She worships the devil

C) She doesn't have a boyfriend (by the nickname of Fuzzy)

D) All of the above.

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Did I mention she is getting confirmed next week?. We are prepared for a lot of kicking and screaming.

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Old man Geller (Becky's dad) looking like a sissy dying eggs. He can usually be found with a Pepsi in one hand and a bag of Old Dutch chips in another.

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Nina on the 4 hour car ride home says, "Daddy, I'm tired!"

We got back in time for me to head out to do a lap of the Oxbow course. The sun is low and the shadow is long.

This is the Oxenburg. It will kick your ass. Maybe not the first time up it, but definitely by the last lap. A large portion of this is at 22%. I made it up in my 39X23. I am not doing that 4 times this Saturday! (Note, the gravel road in the distance is the same road.)

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There will be many casualties at Oxbow. This critter only made it down the hill from the Oxenburg before he conked out. Poor little fella. Cashew would bring him home and throw him in the microwave. Just like he was planning on doing with his week old coffee.

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Headed home on the Douglas trail. Too much crap on the bars.

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It is supposed to snow tomorrow. How funny is that?

Yahoo

So I did a Yahoo image search on my first name. Here are the 1st three pictures that popped up.

Check it out, my name in lights.

Dude, check out that hairdo!

Uhhhhh, I don't know about that.

So I think I like the first one the best.

Climbing with Cashew.

Hit the hills today. Sustained (well as sustained as you can get here in Rochester) threshold climbing was the order of the day. Me on the Paragon, Cashew was on his Trek Madone full of Boron. I thought I rode strong, but my pedals were all in one piece at the end. Obviously, I was stronger Sunday. Together we climbed and climbed. I didn't bring the camera, so here I am finishing up the ride in the kitchen. Cheesy? Yes. Brilliant at the same time? Just maybe.

Nina sees you.

Yo, yo. Gizel to the wizel.

POWER.

Did my threshold testing this weekend. I am officially 10% stronger then I was a in November. The impressive thing was not that I was stronger, but that the need to hurl (like last time) was replaced with the strength and energy to go for a ride afterwards. The ability to recover after hard efforts will be key in my big races this year.

I am so strong now look at what I did to my pedals the next day. Yeah, I am bad ass now. Or was that fat ass? Uhh, never mind.

Work, shmurck.